Thursday, March 20, 2008

hourglass = donkey balls

when i say that a knitting pattern is poorly written, i am not saying it as just some bitter knitter who had to rip back about 40 rows of knitting. of course i am bitter about having just ripped out 40 rows of knitting, but! i am also a professional writer so i do know what i am talking about.

i do get paid to take scads of information and make it clear and concise. i have a degree in it. i've been doing it for nearly 10 years. i know of which i speak.

the hourglass sweater pattern sucks! donkey! balls!

the instructions are not clear. i did read them and re-read them more than a few times. apparently my reading comprehension is lacking when it comes to this pattern. i was nearly done my decreases when i tried the sweater on tuesday night at knitting. the front looked great. the back was all droopy and weird and yeah, donkey balls.

did i mention i had already grafted the arm pits? i ripped back to the graft and carefully picked up all 200-and-whatever number of stitches and started decreasing again. le sigh.

in other news, two weeks ago we had the mother of all snow storms. my mom needed to do some errands in the middle of the storm and i was still acting as her driver. as we walked out of chapters, i was looking down and spotted an ipod in the snow. it was barely visible and at first i thought it was some glossy apple insert for a magazine. i picked it up and lo! an 8 MB video ipod in bright pink, in perfect working order.

i walked back into the store and asked them to put a note with my number in the lost and found. the ipod has been sitting, waiting for it's owner call for two weeks. can i claim it as my own yet? maybe this is my karmic reward for returning two lost cell phones.

if you have an ipod, put your name and number in it. i would totally give this woman a call if i knew her number.

3 comments:

S-BD said...

Ah! 40 freakin' rows! That is donkey balls indeed! My heart goes out to you. But hopefully this weekend will give you some time to get back all those lost stitches.

Anonymous said...
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Ms. Hedda said...

IMHO, the iPod is yours based on the pain and suffering of the 40 freakin' rows.